Did you have a dream once? Are you living it, or are you, like a lot of people in the world, leading a life of mediocrity, settling for much less than you know you’re capable of? Do you think kids should leave high school feeling like that? Middle school? God forbid, elementary school? Because that’s what we’re teaching them. That’s what we were most likely taught.
Since I first began working with teens, I have become increasingly inspired. And I am determined to pass that inspiration on to whoever will listen. Teenagers, like everyone else, have great potential but can’t seem to get past their anger, their doubts, or their way of doing things, and so they end up in trouble, expelled, suspended. We adults end up in the same place, with our lives suspended because of our fears, our doubts, and our own “way” of doing things.
Although I don’t personally relate to the specific situations all the kids I work with come from, it doesn’t mean that I can’t meet them where they are. I know what it is like to feel unloved, to feel misunderstood, to feel alone, to feel angry at how things are, and to feel what it is like to watch the people around you question who you are. We ALL know what that is like. At some point or another, we have all been disappointed, treated unfairly, or felt betrayed by life. This is exactly why we must reach out and tell our children that it’s normal to feel what they feel, that it’s ok to hurt, that it’s ok to be angry, that it’s ok to feel all of these things so that they can heal and move on with their lives.
Whether we like it or not, we, as adults, are leaders. We are leading today’s children into either a life of inspiration or a life that will pass them by. As leaders, we have to stop covering up the past as though it doesn’t matter. We have to be willing to look at how it’s “always been done” and identify what isn’t working anymore. We need to help our kids empower themselves to be who they know they are. If a child is acting out, doesn’t it make sense that there’s a reason for it? Why would someone “act out” just for the sake of acting out? Don’t we act out? We blame our spouse, our boss, our partner, the driver in front of us who’s going too slow…How “adult-like” is our behavior, really?
The kids I work with all tell me things that they have never shared with anyone…they trust me because I take the time to meet them where they are. I don’t judge their choices. I accept their choices because they are the ones who suffer their own consequences. We need to show our kids that they are creative, that they are magnificent and great human beings, instead of telling them they are bad and that they need to be fixed. We only tell them that because that’s what we’re telling ourselves. They don’t need to be fixed, they need to be loved. They need someone to show up for them.
Each of my students in the O’Nan Project for Change has come up with their own project for this first school year. One of them is creating a mentoring program for 2nd grade students where she wants to empower young kids to find their courage now. The program is called “The Real You.” Another student wants to create the first skateboarding club for kids in the City of Starkville. Another student wants to create a summer fun-camp for kids all ages. Another student wants to get her babysitting certificate and create a tutoring program called “Tiny Learners.” And our 5th student has a desire to be a clothing designer one day and wants to start by creating her own shirts. Each of these things is easy to help support.
Imagine if there were a class in each school that allowed kids to explore their current dreams, to see where they may take them? Imagine if our students had the opportunity to be supported in something that they loved and know that they were going to get that support? Imagine, when you were their age, if you had had someone come and tell you that you could do and be anything you wanted to be? Imagine that. Imagine a world where we all took the time to help one another find our greatness and we actually supported each other in doing what it took to make it happen? Imagine it.
We have to stop placing expectations on our kids and start allowing them to see the world as a place of possibility, a place of fulfillment, a place where their dreams can actually happen. If we empower our kids, then we empower our world. It’s time to step up.
But how can we empower anyone if we’re not empowered ourselves? How can the kids of today’s world learn about pursuing their dreams if all they see around them is adults who have given up on theirs? How can we acknowledge greatness in anyone else if we haven’t acknowledged our own? How can we dare to tell someone to go after their heart’s desire if we haven’t had the courage to even look at our own? We are put on this earth to serve each other. We are put on this earth to be great. We are put on this earth to love. How can we do any of those fully if we can’t admit to the calling of our heart, if we can’t be “as little children” and return to the excitement of asking “what if?…”
It’s time to rise up! It’s time for us as adults to choose our own dream so that our kids know it is ok to choose their own. It’s time for us all to step up and step out boldly. We all have dreams, and we all know what it’s like to lose heart. There’s an old saying that says, “it’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all…” The same can be said for dreams. When was the last time you “indulged” in contemplating your own dream? Now is the time. It’s time to wake up. Your dream was given to you to manifest in this life, not to rest in the safety of slumber. We all need to be empowered. Find someone who will support you. Believe in yourself. Believe you were made for greatness! If you don’t, I will until you do.